This group is for all you Monty Python enthusiasts out there. How many of you joined Netflix (or Blockbuster)so that you can get all the old Monty Python episodes and movies? Who is your favorite Monty Python member? Stephen’s favorite is John Cleese, but he also likes Eric Idle. Tegwedd finds it difficult to choose one, but if forced to choose a favorite, she would say Terry Jones because he’s Welsh, and she likes the first name Terry. John Cleese has adapted very well to Hollywood, although he and Palin play off each other very well in A Fish Called Wanda.
Which is your favorite sketch? Tegwedd is torn among three: the one where they’re asking great philosophers inane questions about sports, the Upper Class Twit games, and the Lumberjack song. Stephen’s favorite sketch is the Dead Parrot sketch. It is also Dylan Cook’s favorite sketch, and the sketch this group is names after. Another favorite vignette of Tegwedd’s is the FreeMason vignette, and another favorite sketch of hers is the “Nudge nudge wink wink” sketch. Which is your favorite Monty Python movie? Stephen’s, as you might suspect, is Monty Python & the Holy Grail, while Tagwedd’s fave is Jabberwocky. You can probably get it through Netflix if you just want to view it, and Amazon.com if you want to own a copy. Why do all of you love the Monty Python? Tegwedd loves it because she loves British humor. Stephen does because the Python changed social behavior and attitudes towards controversial things. It brought the concept of being gay out in the open, because of Graham Chapman being gay.
They are one group who helped create the concept of music in comedy. Across the pond, at about the same time, the Firesign Theatre did the same. South Park was influenced by both groups. There is a South Park musical about the Mormon church on Broadway right now, and even the Mormons like it. Cheech & Chong were also influenced with their “Born in East LA.”
So far as Stephen knows, and Tegwedd’s research on the subject bears this out, Yellowbeard was Graham Chapman’s last movie role. He portrayed King Arthur in Monty Python & the Holy Grail, and Brian in Life of Brian. What is your favorite Monty Python song? Ours is “The Lumberjack Song.” Stephen’s second favorite is “Every Sperm Is Sacred” from The Meaning of Life. Dylan, we haven’t heard from you in awhile. We’d love for you to post to this group. He started the Monty Python Fan Club on Yahoo. We’re trying to kill that group because it doesn’t have an owner. Dylan changed his nick, and the name cited as owner is his old nick.
Many Monty Python members besides Graham Chapman have done solo movie roles. There was A Fish Called Wanda for John Cleese and Michael Palin. Then for Palin there’s Three Men In a Boat, The Missionary, A Private Function, American Friends, Wind in the Willows, Willows in Winter, Fierce Creatures, and Not the Messiah (He’s a Very Naughty Boy). John Cleese’s movie roles are too numerous to mention. He did Fierce Creatures with Michael Palin, and many more by himself. Eric Idle did All You Need Is Cash (the Rutles mockumentary), Hollywood Burn, the voice of Waddlesworth the parrot in 102 Dalmations, and the voice of Merlin the magician in Shrek the Third. Dylan’s favorite Monty Python movie is Monty Python & the Holy Grail. Terry Jones is known mostly for directing movies other than the Monty Python films. Wind in the Willows and Erik the Viking. Terry Gilliam is more of a director and animator than a performer. He directed several movies, among them The Adventures of Baron Munchausen and Brazil. John Cleese was a star of Fawlty Towers. His character Fawlty, was based upon a real hotel manager whose rude approach to customer service was memorable for Cleese. Tegwedd didn’t care for the show, and only watched one or two episodes, but Stephen loved the show. It was cancelled after 2 seasons. Cleese is both the most prolific of the Python, and the eldest, having been born in 1939. Terry Gilliam, the only American of the Python was born in Medicine Lake, MN in 1940. His family moved to California a few years later after his sister had pneumonia. Graham Chapman didn’t die of AIDS as most people assume, but of throat cancer because he was always sucking on that infernal pipe of his. This information is from the Wikipedia.
Do any of you know of any other Monty Python groups we can hook up with. We’d like to connect with these other groups and share information, perhaps the other groups can post to our groups. Carol Cleveland was the only actual woman to play parts in the Monty Python sketches. The other women’s parts were played by members of the Monty Python themselves in women’s clothes and falsetto voices. She was in the Lumberjack sketch in the Jeanette McDonald role. Stephen believes that transvestism in the Monty Python sketches originates in the “Carry On” movies of the 50s and early 60s. Cross-dressing and transvestism are very common themes in British comedy. Peter Cook and Dudley Moore were comedic partners in Bedazzled and were great friends with Benny Hill and the Monty Python. Stephen believes they played the female parts themselves because they were on a shoestring budget and want to have to pay female actors. In Monty Python & the Holy Grail, they used coconut shells instead of horses, which was hilarious. Terry Gilliam in the movie was Patsy the devoted servant who carried everyone’s luggage, and gets killed by the Trojan chicken falling on him. He was the cartoonist in Jabberwocky being chased by the Jabberwock doing these crazy cartoons when his character has a heart attack. Gilliam was the hidden Python member. He was also the wise man in the hut telling Lancelot that he must get a shrubbery. How did Terry Gilliam wind up with the Monty Python? Neither of us can figure it out. It wasn’t in the Wikipedia article. We’re both very curious about this. Help satisfy our curiosity. If you find anything else about the Monty Python that you think we’d like to know, please post, and let us know. If you have any other tidbits about the sketches or the movies, please post them as well.
The Monty Python was a direct heir to the Beyond the Fringe comedy troupe of the late 50s, early 60s and the Carry On movies of the 50s going into the 90s. If anyone knows of a Carry on movie having been released in the 2000s, please let us know.
Stephen will have no computer access after today, July 22nd, until his laptop returns. When it returns, we’ll return to preparing the 3 sample chapters to Llewellyn. The Mission statement for the Abbott’s Inn International School of Magick provides a gentle nurturing environment that promotes education in both the atmosphere and specific tools of magick. As always, call 1-888-611-7982 for all your divination reading, learning class, and Pagan-magickal research needs, or go to http://abbottsinninternational.com/ , http://abbottsinn.com/ , and http://abbottsinn.wordpress.com , and our Ning network http://abbottsinn.ning.com/ .
Saturday, July 23, 2011
Sunday, June 12, 2011
Of Putties, Being Broke, and Art
Welcome to our latest blog on our Ning network. Sorry we’ve been gone so long. We’ve had a lot of computer issues. My HP Pavilion died on February 1st, then Stephen’s laptop had to go into the shop again for the 24th time since he’d gotten it nearly 3 years ago. On June 1st, our favorite putty, Bailee was poisoned. She died a slow agonizing and painful death all because some a__hole decided it was better to kill a few rats using poison than to let the animals (both cats and dogs kill the rodents the more natural way, the way the Goddess intended. There are certain breeds of dog, your smaller breeds that are uniquely suited to hunting down rats and killing them. The reason cats moved from Egypt to all over the world was because of their primal skills in hunting down both rats and mice. As you can probably tell, I’m still pretty angry about it. Bailee was a sweet, loving, docile cat. Stephen had her for 4 ½ years, counting out the time she was with Debbie and Megan.
I had three songs I used to sing to Bailee: “Hey there Bailee Girl,” “Bailee Go ‘Round the Roses,” and the Temptations’ “My Girl.” She didn’t care if you had an operatic voice like Pat Benatar, or sounded like a foghorn. She didn’t even care if you could carry a tune. She loved to be sung to. I guess it was because it meant you were paying attention to her. She was a love and affection sponge. She would soak up all the affection you had to give her and beg for more. Bailee meant a great deal to us. Losing her has made a big hole in our household. We considered her to be very magickal. She was the inventor of the “Hundredth Putty Phenomenon”, a takeoff from Ken Keyes’ 100th Monkey Phenomenon. Bailee would stick her paw in the food bin, take out a piece of food, and and eat it. She taught all the other putties, and soon they were all doing it. We don’t know whether the putties in the next block are doing it or not. The following is a poem I wrote to Bailee:
Bailee you were so sweet
You made the birds go tweet
Loving, you gave us two hours
To stop petting you among the flowers
You liked to stare at the roses
And bite us on our noses
Your purr was very loud
Although going out was not allowed
You were unbowed
By your weight and long fur
Very seldom did you go grrr
We love you very much
You thrilled to our very touch
You taught them all the hundredth putty
Although you were a mutty
Your crossed paws signaled danger
Known to us but not a stranger
When you’re not near us we’re blue
O Bailee we love you!
Friday we went into Stephen’s Bunko de Amerika account, and instead of the $400+ he expected to see in his account, there was just a little more than $100. Seventy had been taken out for overdraft charges. The rest of the money had simply evaporated. The only good news is that the bank did pay the checks. The bad news is that he doesn’t have the money to pay anything on the rent. He desperately needs as many paid readings as possible. Just 20 readings, classes, and/or research gigs would get him out of this mess he’s gotten himself into. Don’t set back and think that your neighbor will do it, he needs YOUR reading now. If you’re local, the number is 916-455-2267. The toll-free number 1-888-611-7982. For donations, you can go to Paypal at abbotts_inn@yahoo.com. The stress and anxiety is taking a toll on his health. His asthma has been acting up. This afternoon we’ll be going to pick up his inhaler stuff. Stephen plans to call Bunko de America tomorrow and see if he can get one or both of the charges refunded. Will him good luck. He thinks he has a chance, as he hasn’t asked for this for over a year. As Judy Tenuda, the Goddess says, our favorite comedienne says, “It could happen!”
We were on our way last night to Gallery 14 to see the new exhibit. Last month we we were resting at a bus stop when someone came along and said, “That bus doesn’t run here anymore.” We replied “We know, we’re just resting and working.” This time I thought I’d reply with an old joke. Stephen wants me to tell it here, so here it is:
A woman went into her kitchen and opened the door to her refrigerator to discover a squirrel reclining on one of the shelves. “What are you doing here?” she askeed.
“Is this a Westinghouse?” it asked, referring to the brand of the fridge.
“Well, I’m westing,” the squirrel replied..
The art by Cynthia Parker is abstract mosaics made with broken mirrors. In a way, it’s accidental art. I interviewed her about her art. I asked that old chestnut, “Where do you get your ideas?”
You know, I used to live with a psychopath. I had all these mirrors I’d collected since I was a child, and he broke them all. I said to myself ‘I can’t get rid of them, I just can’t bear it.’ So I started to put them back together. I didn’t manipulate the pieces in any way. I did play with them a bit, and these are the result.”
My personal favorites are “Angel” because I could actually see the wings sweeping up, and “The Rose” because I could see the petals and leaves.
Stephen said of it that “It’s very unique, unusual, and self-exposing because you can see yourself in it.”
Walt said in the flyer on it, “Cynthia Parker holds up a cracked mirror for our inspection, and shows us the image of our fragmented selves--imperfect, yet perfectly fascinating.”
The exhibit is at Gallery 14, 3960 60th st. at 14th Avenue, Sacramento, CA 95820, and runs until July 2nd.
I think it’s a very creative way of using something that otherwise would be trashed. It’s kind of like found art.
Stephen said, “It takes some effort to break the pieces in such a way as to produce the desired effect.”
I said to him, “I’m surprised you’d want to see an exhibit like this. It’s a bad place for vampires.”
“They’re already broken.”
“Vampires don’t break mirrors, silly, they just don’t show up in them.”
“I’m not a full-fledged vampire, and besides, I’m adaptable.”
Ms. Parker said, “After I ran out of my own mirrors, people started bringing me their broken mirrors. She seemed anxious and nervous whether people would like it. Indeed, from the smell of her, she had armed herself with several doses of Dutch courage before coming there.
“Modern art is all about confidence,” I told her, and told her the story of the “Emperor’s New Clothes”, which is my favorite analogy about modern art.
Belisama showed up. She’s going to school with a view towards getting a degree in forensic psychology and criminal justice. She’s a Witch I met almost 2 years ago at the Pagan Pride festival in September ‘09. She had her husband Charlie and her youngest granddaughter, Aurora, in tow. The child found some drawing materials, and settled down to generating her own kind of art. Stephen first met her when she was a teen runaway in his commune back in September, ‘71.
We met Sioux, who is an activist for medical marijuana, which is a subject close to our hearts. She gave us a ride home, so I didn’t have to struggle on the long walk home. Marijuana was the only substance that helped her after the “traditional” pharmaceuticals made her sick almost to death. We discussed NORML. I got her phone number, so I’m going to call her later on.
Remember, go to http://abbottsinninternational.com/ , http://abbottsinn.com/, call 1-888-611-7982, and order a reading, a class, and or research. YOUR reading could be the one that enables Stephen to go to Walmart and get s $500 money order to send to our landlady.
I had three songs I used to sing to Bailee: “Hey there Bailee Girl,” “Bailee Go ‘Round the Roses,” and the Temptations’ “My Girl.” She didn’t care if you had an operatic voice like Pat Benatar, or sounded like a foghorn. She didn’t even care if you could carry a tune. She loved to be sung to. I guess it was because it meant you were paying attention to her. She was a love and affection sponge. She would soak up all the affection you had to give her and beg for more. Bailee meant a great deal to us. Losing her has made a big hole in our household. We considered her to be very magickal. She was the inventor of the “Hundredth Putty Phenomenon”, a takeoff from Ken Keyes’ 100th Monkey Phenomenon. Bailee would stick her paw in the food bin, take out a piece of food, and and eat it. She taught all the other putties, and soon they were all doing it. We don’t know whether the putties in the next block are doing it or not. The following is a poem I wrote to Bailee:
Bailee you were so sweet
You made the birds go tweet
Loving, you gave us two hours
To stop petting you among the flowers
You liked to stare at the roses
And bite us on our noses
Your purr was very loud
Although going out was not allowed
You were unbowed
By your weight and long fur
Very seldom did you go grrr
We love you very much
You thrilled to our very touch
You taught them all the hundredth putty
Although you were a mutty
Your crossed paws signaled danger
Known to us but not a stranger
When you’re not near us we’re blue
O Bailee we love you!
Friday we went into Stephen’s Bunko de Amerika account, and instead of the $400+ he expected to see in his account, there was just a little more than $100. Seventy had been taken out for overdraft charges. The rest of the money had simply evaporated. The only good news is that the bank did pay the checks. The bad news is that he doesn’t have the money to pay anything on the rent. He desperately needs as many paid readings as possible. Just 20 readings, classes, and/or research gigs would get him out of this mess he’s gotten himself into. Don’t set back and think that your neighbor will do it, he needs YOUR reading now. If you’re local, the number is 916-455-2267. The toll-free number 1-888-611-7982. For donations, you can go to Paypal at abbotts_inn@yahoo.com. The stress and anxiety is taking a toll on his health. His asthma has been acting up. This afternoon we’ll be going to pick up his inhaler stuff. Stephen plans to call Bunko de America tomorrow and see if he can get one or both of the charges refunded. Will him good luck. He thinks he has a chance, as he hasn’t asked for this for over a year. As Judy Tenuda, the Goddess says, our favorite comedienne says, “It could happen!”
We were on our way last night to Gallery 14 to see the new exhibit. Last month we we were resting at a bus stop when someone came along and said, “That bus doesn’t run here anymore.” We replied “We know, we’re just resting and working.” This time I thought I’d reply with an old joke. Stephen wants me to tell it here, so here it is:
A woman went into her kitchen and opened the door to her refrigerator to discover a squirrel reclining on one of the shelves. “What are you doing here?” she askeed.
“Is this a Westinghouse?” it asked, referring to the brand of the fridge.
“Well, I’m westing,” the squirrel replied..
The art by Cynthia Parker is abstract mosaics made with broken mirrors. In a way, it’s accidental art. I interviewed her about her art. I asked that old chestnut, “Where do you get your ideas?”
You know, I used to live with a psychopath. I had all these mirrors I’d collected since I was a child, and he broke them all. I said to myself ‘I can’t get rid of them, I just can’t bear it.’ So I started to put them back together. I didn’t manipulate the pieces in any way. I did play with them a bit, and these are the result.”
My personal favorites are “Angel” because I could actually see the wings sweeping up, and “The Rose” because I could see the petals and leaves.
Stephen said of it that “It’s very unique, unusual, and self-exposing because you can see yourself in it.”
Walt said in the flyer on it, “Cynthia Parker holds up a cracked mirror for our inspection, and shows us the image of our fragmented selves--imperfect, yet perfectly fascinating.”
The exhibit is at Gallery 14, 3960 60th st. at 14th Avenue, Sacramento, CA 95820, and runs until July 2nd.
I think it’s a very creative way of using something that otherwise would be trashed. It’s kind of like found art.
Stephen said, “It takes some effort to break the pieces in such a way as to produce the desired effect.”
I said to him, “I’m surprised you’d want to see an exhibit like this. It’s a bad place for vampires.”
“They’re already broken.”
“Vampires don’t break mirrors, silly, they just don’t show up in them.”
“I’m not a full-fledged vampire, and besides, I’m adaptable.”
Ms. Parker said, “After I ran out of my own mirrors, people started bringing me their broken mirrors. She seemed anxious and nervous whether people would like it. Indeed, from the smell of her, she had armed herself with several doses of Dutch courage before coming there.
“Modern art is all about confidence,” I told her, and told her the story of the “Emperor’s New Clothes”, which is my favorite analogy about modern art.
Belisama showed up. She’s going to school with a view towards getting a degree in forensic psychology and criminal justice. She’s a Witch I met almost 2 years ago at the Pagan Pride festival in September ‘09. She had her husband Charlie and her youngest granddaughter, Aurora, in tow. The child found some drawing materials, and settled down to generating her own kind of art. Stephen first met her when she was a teen runaway in his commune back in September, ‘71.
We met Sioux, who is an activist for medical marijuana, which is a subject close to our hearts. She gave us a ride home, so I didn’t have to struggle on the long walk home. Marijuana was the only substance that helped her after the “traditional” pharmaceuticals made her sick almost to death. We discussed NORML. I got her phone number, so I’m going to call her later on.
Remember, go to http://abbottsinninternational.com/ , http://abbottsinn.com/, call 1-888-611-7982, and order a reading, a class, and or research. YOUR reading could be the one that enables Stephen to go to Walmart and get s $500 money order to send to our landlady.
Friday, June 3, 2011
Goodbye, Bailee, and We Go On
Early Wednesday afternoon Bailee died. We think it was rat poison. With so man cats and dogs on this block, why do they insist on using poison? It’s better to let the animals control the rat population. Another possibility is spider bite. The vet said that it was an unusual poison, because there was no bleeding of the eyes, nose or mouth. Tegwedd thinks she might have had some convulsions. She seemed to jerk a bit while Tegwedd held her, but she thought that Bailee was just trying to catch her breath. Debbie thought it might be a spider bite. Stephen found a headless rat by where he found her. Stephen and Walt buried Bailee in the very back of the backyard. We said some words over her grave, and Tegwedd planted a small walnut seedling on her grave.
Dr. Livingston is lying on her back between the back cushion and the back of the couch. She got on the arm of the couch, then when Stephen petted her, she fell backwards into the trash can.
Bailee taught the other putties the hundredth putty, where the putty will reach in with hir paw, and take out one piece of food, then eat it out of the food bin. The hundredth putty thing is a take off from the 100th monkey phenomenon. When you get to critical mass, all the putties across the street, and across the city will be doing it.
The house seems empty without Bailee, which is strange when you consider how full of stuff this house is. Pyewacket and Putty Bear like to hang out on the stove. Tegwedd said, “Do you know which song they should be singing?” “No, what?” said Stephen. “Home...home on the range,” she sang.
We’ll missed the crossed paws. It was dangerous when Bailee crossed her paws in front of her. It was a form of communication--putty sign language. We always thought that they were plotting something dastardly and nefarious. The putties sit on the TV remote and change the channel. A lot of the time they change it to Animal Planet.
Tegwedd’s ex-hubby Andy used to steer Bailee around on her back on the carpet, and she would just buzz her head off. The putties have tag team wrestling matches. They engage in putty combat whenever possible. Just a little while ago we heard some growling coming from the stove. Neither of us got up to investigate. Stephen asked, “What’s for dinner?” Tegwedd asked, “Where’s my dinner, taking a cue from what Putty Bear said when he first came in here.
We now have a pentacle of putties. After 10 pm we turn off the porch light. Tegwedd stretched out her feet on the footstool, aka the Summer Palace, and Frakki, who was already there, sniffed at her feet then attacked them. Tegwedd had Pyewacket resting on her chest, where she likes to lie, and Dr. Livingston came over and whapped the other putty for no good reason. Frakki has created her own form of divination using used drinking straws, which she scatters all over the floor. Tegwedd is working out a way of interpreting the pattern thus formed. She thinks it’ll be similar to tea leaf reading, coffee grounds reading, or bean reading, but she isn’t quite sure. We’re going to see Bailee in our peripheral vision for quite some time. The back yard is now Bailee’s yard. She loved the yard. She liked to look at it from the back porch. She also liked to look at the roses from the window. Tegwedd used to sing “Bailee go ‘round the Roses” (a take off of the old song “Sally go ‘round the Roses) to her. Bailee loved it when we sang to her. All the putties love to be sung to. It doesn’t matter what kind of voice you have, or whether you can carry a tune. They love the attention. Tegwedd also sang “Hey there Bailee Girl” to her. Bailee was 24 lbs. of comedy and terror, emphasis on the comedy. She had many names, Bailee Beasely Beastly, Triple B Threat, 3B, Ma Bailee, and Machine Gun Bailee. But we never called her Late for Dinner. Watch your putties. Maybe get them in at 6 pm like we do. Tegwedd’s face is now being licked by Pyewacket. She’ll give you 2 hours to quit scritching her. Tegwedd is surrounded by female putties. Dr. Livingston is at her left shoulder on the back of the couch, Pyewacket is still on her chest, and Frakki is on the footstool at her feet. Pyewacket is the putty raptor. She is really aggressive when it comes to cold cuts. She’ll bite your finger if it’s near a piece of salami. Putty Bear has gotten huge, but what comes out of his mouth but squeaks. We’re seeing if Cirque de Soleil would like to have Dr. Livingston for awhile as a contortionist. But these putties can form very regal poses then they’ll lie on their backs with their paws in the air in these hilarious poses. They’re very tough putties, you know. They can lick anyone in the house, and often do. But they aren’t good watch dogs. Worst they can do to you is lick you to death or bite your nose. The closest they get to watch putties is that we watch them.
Putty Bear is very very funny. He knows when you’re getting ready to go out, and he’s right at the door to escape when you leave. Nor can he be gotten back inside quickly or easily. He’s become very predictable as to where he goes when he’s not supposed to go out. He can be found on the side of the house, curled up into a ball, forming his very own miniature crop circle. Boy is he going to be mad when Stephen weed eats that long grass. He’ll have to find another spot to press down. Since Bailee’s death, the other putties have, in our opinion, become more affectionate. Last night Pyewacket gave Tegwedd’s face a thorough bath, focusing on her nose. She spent a good part of the evening and this morning on Tegwedd’s chest. Like the others. she’s a tough putty, and can lick anyone in the house. When you’re petting her, she’ll give you about 2 hours to stop, and often does. Putty Bear used to lose their fights, but since he’s gotten so huge, he’s won 3 fights against Pyewacket so far.
The Sheriff’s Dept. is investigating the poisoning, and Stephen will contact the SPCA. Even though Dr. Livingston is a full adult, she is still a shoulder putty. Most shoulder putties grow out of it, but she hasn’t. When Stephen brought in Putty Bear, Dr. Livingston was on his shoulder. As has been mentioned before, the surviving putties make up a pentacle of putties. Let’s hear it for Magickal Pentacle Putty Power! Inky, our panther putty, is the elder now. I call him Inka Dinka Doodle Doo. The two males are not related to the three females. Inky is Tegwedd’s boy friend now. She told the Queen that her boyfriend was short and black. The Queen guessed right away that Tegwedd was talking about a putty. When Tegwedd first moved in, Inky lowered her blood pressure 11 points. Inky is 1st putty, who lived in pits and learned to use his claws in self defense. That’s an adaptation of a FireSign Theatre routine.
Here is a poem that Tegwedd wrote to Bailee:
Ode to Bailee
Bailee, you were so sweet
You made the birds go tweet tweet
Loving, you gave us two hours
To stop petting you among the flowers
You liked to stare at the roses
And bite us on our noses
Your purr was very loud
Even though going out was not allowed
You were unbowed
By your weight and long fur
Very seldom did you go grrr!
We love you very much
You thrilled to our very touch
You taught them all the hundredth putty
Even though you were mutty
Your crossed paws signalled danger
Known by us but not a stranger
When you’re not near us, we’re blue
O Bailee we love you!
To sum this whole thing up, we miss Bailee, but the rest of the putties are doing their best to console us for her loss. We noe have a pentacle of putties that keep our stress level down by making us laugh at their comical antics. When one of them tries to jump up on something like the video tape cabinet or coffee table and misses, falling down in a most undignified manner, they try to recapture their dignity while we quote the immortal words of our favorite stand up philosopher, the late great George Carlin, “I meant to do that. I’ve been planning it all week. I’ll be here till Thursday.”
Dr. Livingston is lying on her back between the back cushion and the back of the couch. She got on the arm of the couch, then when Stephen petted her, she fell backwards into the trash can.
Bailee taught the other putties the hundredth putty, where the putty will reach in with hir paw, and take out one piece of food, then eat it out of the food bin. The hundredth putty thing is a take off from the 100th monkey phenomenon. When you get to critical mass, all the putties across the street, and across the city will be doing it.
The house seems empty without Bailee, which is strange when you consider how full of stuff this house is. Pyewacket and Putty Bear like to hang out on the stove. Tegwedd said, “Do you know which song they should be singing?” “No, what?” said Stephen. “Home...home on the range,” she sang.
We’ll missed the crossed paws. It was dangerous when Bailee crossed her paws in front of her. It was a form of communication--putty sign language. We always thought that they were plotting something dastardly and nefarious. The putties sit on the TV remote and change the channel. A lot of the time they change it to Animal Planet.
Tegwedd’s ex-hubby Andy used to steer Bailee around on her back on the carpet, and she would just buzz her head off. The putties have tag team wrestling matches. They engage in putty combat whenever possible. Just a little while ago we heard some growling coming from the stove. Neither of us got up to investigate. Stephen asked, “What’s for dinner?” Tegwedd asked, “Where’s my dinner, taking a cue from what Putty Bear said when he first came in here.
We now have a pentacle of putties. After 10 pm we turn off the porch light. Tegwedd stretched out her feet on the footstool, aka the Summer Palace, and Frakki, who was already there, sniffed at her feet then attacked them. Tegwedd had Pyewacket resting on her chest, where she likes to lie, and Dr. Livingston came over and whapped the other putty for no good reason. Frakki has created her own form of divination using used drinking straws, which she scatters all over the floor. Tegwedd is working out a way of interpreting the pattern thus formed. She thinks it’ll be similar to tea leaf reading, coffee grounds reading, or bean reading, but she isn’t quite sure. We’re going to see Bailee in our peripheral vision for quite some time. The back yard is now Bailee’s yard. She loved the yard. She liked to look at it from the back porch. She also liked to look at the roses from the window. Tegwedd used to sing “Bailee go ‘round the Roses” (a take off of the old song “Sally go ‘round the Roses) to her. Bailee loved it when we sang to her. All the putties love to be sung to. It doesn’t matter what kind of voice you have, or whether you can carry a tune. They love the attention. Tegwedd also sang “Hey there Bailee Girl” to her. Bailee was 24 lbs. of comedy and terror, emphasis on the comedy. She had many names, Bailee Beasely Beastly, Triple B Threat, 3B, Ma Bailee, and Machine Gun Bailee. But we never called her Late for Dinner. Watch your putties. Maybe get them in at 6 pm like we do. Tegwedd’s face is now being licked by Pyewacket. She’ll give you 2 hours to quit scritching her. Tegwedd is surrounded by female putties. Dr. Livingston is at her left shoulder on the back of the couch, Pyewacket is still on her chest, and Frakki is on the footstool at her feet. Pyewacket is the putty raptor. She is really aggressive when it comes to cold cuts. She’ll bite your finger if it’s near a piece of salami. Putty Bear has gotten huge, but what comes out of his mouth but squeaks. We’re seeing if Cirque de Soleil would like to have Dr. Livingston for awhile as a contortionist. But these putties can form very regal poses then they’ll lie on their backs with their paws in the air in these hilarious poses. They’re very tough putties, you know. They can lick anyone in the house, and often do. But they aren’t good watch dogs. Worst they can do to you is lick you to death or bite your nose. The closest they get to watch putties is that we watch them.
Putty Bear is very very funny. He knows when you’re getting ready to go out, and he’s right at the door to escape when you leave. Nor can he be gotten back inside quickly or easily. He’s become very predictable as to where he goes when he’s not supposed to go out. He can be found on the side of the house, curled up into a ball, forming his very own miniature crop circle. Boy is he going to be mad when Stephen weed eats that long grass. He’ll have to find another spot to press down. Since Bailee’s death, the other putties have, in our opinion, become more affectionate. Last night Pyewacket gave Tegwedd’s face a thorough bath, focusing on her nose. She spent a good part of the evening and this morning on Tegwedd’s chest. Like the others. she’s a tough putty, and can lick anyone in the house. When you’re petting her, she’ll give you about 2 hours to stop, and often does. Putty Bear used to lose their fights, but since he’s gotten so huge, he’s won 3 fights against Pyewacket so far.
The Sheriff’s Dept. is investigating the poisoning, and Stephen will contact the SPCA. Even though Dr. Livingston is a full adult, she is still a shoulder putty. Most shoulder putties grow out of it, but she hasn’t. When Stephen brought in Putty Bear, Dr. Livingston was on his shoulder. As has been mentioned before, the surviving putties make up a pentacle of putties. Let’s hear it for Magickal Pentacle Putty Power! Inky, our panther putty, is the elder now. I call him Inka Dinka Doodle Doo. The two males are not related to the three females. Inky is Tegwedd’s boy friend now. She told the Queen that her boyfriend was short and black. The Queen guessed right away that Tegwedd was talking about a putty. When Tegwedd first moved in, Inky lowered her blood pressure 11 points. Inky is 1st putty, who lived in pits and learned to use his claws in self defense. That’s an adaptation of a FireSign Theatre routine.
Here is a poem that Tegwedd wrote to Bailee:
Ode to Bailee
Bailee, you were so sweet
You made the birds go tweet tweet
Loving, you gave us two hours
To stop petting you among the flowers
You liked to stare at the roses
And bite us on our noses
Your purr was very loud
Even though going out was not allowed
You were unbowed
By your weight and long fur
Very seldom did you go grrr!
We love you very much
You thrilled to our very touch
You taught them all the hundredth putty
Even though you were mutty
Your crossed paws signalled danger
Known by us but not a stranger
When you’re not near us, we’re blue
O Bailee we love you!
To sum this whole thing up, we miss Bailee, but the rest of the putties are doing their best to console us for her loss. We noe have a pentacle of putties that keep our stress level down by making us laugh at their comical antics. When one of them tries to jump up on something like the video tape cabinet or coffee table and misses, falling down in a most undignified manner, they try to recapture their dignity while we quote the immortal words of our favorite stand up philosopher, the late great George Carlin, “I meant to do that. I’ve been planning it all week. I’ll be here till Thursday.”
Monday, August 9, 2010
Putties & the Firesign Theatre
Welcome to the Order of Humor Magick 8! We’re glad you could make it! Be sure and check out the other Order of Humor Magick groups on other networks. This group is where we Pagans can our humorous experiences with each other. This is either a sister or mother group to our other comedy groups: Paranoia for Pagans, Dead Parrot Fan Club, Putties for Pagans, and Geriatrics for Pagans. We realize that because so many unfunny things have happened to us, it might be difficult to find something humorous, but we’ll try. How about the way I broke my ankle? By sitting on it. Looking back on it, even though it is painful at times, I can now find the humor in the situation. At least this time they didn’t ignore my ankle in favor of my heart, which is fine. I have a good, strong heart. The sentence “We’re glad you could make it!” is a direct quote from the Firesign Theatre’s radio program, which they did in the late ‘60s to the early ‘70s.
Humor is very important to both of us in our magick, and in our daily lives. I literally wouldn’t be alive without it, and neither would Stephen. Of late, most of our humor has derived from our putties. Their antics send us into titters and guffaws, if not hourly, then at least daily. They’re individuals, except for Frikki and Frakki, who we still can’t tell apart. We just call them each Frikki-Frakki. Putties don’t come when they’re called anyway, except when you have food for them. “They come for me, I just say Putties in a high pitched voice. Putties will get you though times of no money better than money will get you through times of no putties.” I can testify to that. I had to go through several years of no putties before I moved here. Our putties have forces of Will. Pyewacket moved in here saying “I live here. This is MY house. These are MY humans.” Pyewacket is an ancient Witch’s familiar name which means “lively spirit.” It was featured in “Bell, Book and Candle.” You can Google it. You might be able to see it on the Internet. But it ranks as one of the better movies there are about Witches and witchcraft, besides “Practical Magic? And “I Married a Witch,” which was, by the way the basis for the popular sitcom “Bewitched”.
By the way, this may be off-topic, but do you know where the term “yarn” as a synonym for story or tale came from? In the olden days, before all our modern electronics, there were storytellers. In some cases, they were full-fledged bards. In other cases, they were just shanachies or storytellers. The women of the household would be spinning, either with a drop spindle or one of those new fangled spinning wheels they came up with a couple hundred years ago. A really good spinner could spin an entire bobbin of yarn whilst the shanachie told one story, hence the term yarn for an often tall tale.
Stephen says it’s funny how many ways SSI claims they’re helping us, when in reality they’re just screwing us over. I explained to him the real meaning of service as in what a bull does to a cow. This may clarify for you what the word “service” means in “Internal Revenue Service.”
If you’ve been following our groups for any length of time at all, you doubtless know about vaudeville occultism. If I’m wrong, and you just joined us, here is whT IT IS. Vaudeville occultism is where a person or persons suddenly burst into song at random moments. This is usually because a given moment or occasion reminds us of a song. These attempts at singing are often off-key, either accidentally or deliberately, just to be funny. If I weren’t encumbered with this damned non-weightbearing cast and a healing broken ankle, I would
For 7 months, from November until June, I was missing one of the two handsets of my main telephone (landline). One day in early June, whilst at my computer I happened to catch a glint of silver in the space between my mattress and the lip of the bed. I picked it up, and lo and behold, it was my missing handset! I went to the doorway of Stephen’s room, and said,
“Frog, this is just gonna kill you. Guess what I just found. It’s charging now.”
“What?”
“You know that handset for my phone that Tina spirited away last November?”
“You found it?”
“Yes!”
The latest thing that Tina has spirited away is the charger for my cell phone and now the cell phone itself. There’s a charger here, but it won’t fit into my cell phone, and my rollover minutes are adding up. I have over 7000 minutes added up, and I’d like to use some of them, if it’s all right with Tina. What has occurred to you that could be considered humorous? Keep in mind that both Stephen and I have rather dark senses of humor, what is commonly known as gallows humor. Some say our senses of humor are twisted, but you walk a few miles in our shoes (yeah, all three of them) and see how straight your sense of humor is.
There is a putty curse of return on this place. It didn’t end with Pyewacket coming in and saying “This is MY house. I live here. These are MY humans.” A little creature about 8 or 9 months old has also made that announcement, with the added question, “Where’s my dinner?” We call him the Grey Bandit. He belongs to the guy next door, but he thinks he belongs here at Puttyhaven. Go figure. He gets along with all the other putties, even Inky likes him, and Inky, my boyfriend, likes very few other putties. What other putties will find their way to our door or window? But Pyewacket attacks him. She’s the one he’s the most like, so I guess she sees him as a rival and a threat. From time to time there is what we call a putty invasion, where a whole bunch of putties come in all at once and disrupt things. The putty mantra is “Where’s my food?”
I store my remotes and a number of CDs in a vitamin box. Bailee constantly tries to lie in the box even though the box is too small for her. Stephen is reciting all this to me whilst sitting in my wheel chair. The female cats are playing with their balls. We thought for over 9 months that Dr. Livingston was male, but I discovered about 3 months ago that she was female. Then when Oreo had her 2nd litter and refused to nurse them after 3 weeks Dr. Livingston stepped up and nursed them. But what did she have to nurse them with? Your guess is as good as mine. We know she wasn’t pregnant, because we had her fixed.
Dr. Livingston is part eagle; she has an eyrie on top of one of my book cases, and will dive bomb you if you’re not careful. The putties knocked the balls out of the round green thing, so Stephen had to put another ball in there. They’re going apes*** over the pink ball, and fighting over it. Bailee Beasley Beastly the Triple B Threat can mimic a beached whale. She’s 25 lbs of comedy and terror emphasis on the comedy part. Frikki-Frakki are a couple of funny putties that we cannot tell apart. At least one of them is a master farter.
We make them bark by talking to them in a high pitched voice, and I usually give them something for barking but Stephen is sadistic, so he doesn’t. The rule is that if there is a putty on your body, you can’t move or go anywhere. Sometimes he will be reading a book in bed, puttied and some important thing will come up on the computer and he’ll take the putty with him when he goes to the computer, because he’s scared of their retribution should he break the rule about moving when puttied. Stephen is an advocate for putty rights. He thinks they should have the right to vote. (You knew he was crazy didn’t you?)
Then there’s the Necroputtycon: their book, “The Way of the Paw”, sacred to the Goddess Bast. Pyewacket is a tough putty, she can lick anyone in the house. Stephen would like to investigate if they lost the other ball because they’re being quiet now, but he can’t because he’s puttied. One of the descriptive mantras about them is “Little pieces of putty crap.” We also sing “How much is that putty in the window?” Charles Hixon introduced me to “Pye, pye, Pyewacket, pye pye Pyewacket chocolate covered Pyewacket! Yum yum yum!”
My boyfriend Inky is “First Putty, who lived in pits, and learned to use his claws in self-defense.” This is a take off on a Firesign Theatre routine. If you ever want a putty to pay strict attention to you, eat in front of hir, especially meat. Man I had two putties paying attention to me. Then when I was through, I put the plate aside so they could lick it. Were they happy then!. One thing about putties; you can make up any stories you want about them and they don’t mind. As long as you feed and water them, provide a clean litter box, and scritch them frequently, you can make up any stories you want.
I have a friend in Houston, TX who has two dogs who are scared silly of thunderstorms. Whenever there is one, and there are lots in Texas, they cry to come in, and lean up against Di and shiver. Rex will bring Di’s room mate her socks if he thinks he can get a treat for them, and the other one will try to rub his backside up against anything he can in the house, but principally Di’s leg. So any pet can be funny. Send us your pet stories, especially the funny ones.
Stephen needs help in finding things that are funny, because life right now does not readily lend itself to humor. He got a real kick out of realizing that Judy Tenuda is still alive, kicking, and still looks hot. She also still calls herself “The Goddess.” We are both big fans of hers, since she is the closest thing we have to a Pagan comic on the airwaves. He wants to see her do an HBO or Showtime special so it won’t be censored. I have a friend who reminds me a lot of her, except that Judy is dark haired and my friend is blonde.
. The Firesign Theatre is alive, well, and on the internet. I looked up the Firesign Theatre this morning. Their website is http://www.firesigntheatre.com/ . Their show can be heard through webstreaming on www.wfmu.org.
A month ago, I broke my right ankle. It was in a gallstone attack. I went to the bathroom, and was going to go to my room again when I was hit by a wave of pain so severe that I passed out. I must’ve sat on my ankle hard because when I tried to get up, my ankle went crunch! I sank down on my rear again against the door. Stephen and I had a dialogue:.”Are you all right?” he asked.
“No, I’m in a lot of pain.”
“I’m calling 911.”
“Ok.”
He asked me the questions the dispatcher asked him. I answered them. At length they arrived. I took my book and my purse with me. We went to Kaiser Morse hospital. I gave them the address. They knew how to get there. We arrived after a few minutes. They admitted me, and the next morning, my ankle was operated on. Then I spent from then until Wednesday the 7th in the hospital. I came home, and am now in full recovery. Three weeks ago I got into my room, and finally got access to my computer. Will give you updates as we proceed. Update: two weeks ago I got out of the house. My physical therapist taught me how to hop down the steps using my aluminum walker. I used it to go to the liturgy meeting, and then Sunday I went to our Grove’s Lughnasadh ritual, where I donated a dollar, and offered some whiskey to Miach for my own healing, the healing of my friend Snoodlady, who was in the hospital with a serious sinus infection that gave her double vision and vertigo, and my friend Cherye who has a nasty staph infection in her legs and feet. On two fronts there were immediate results. Snoodlady felt well enough to come home on Monday, and I learned to carry my walker whilst in my wheelchair. My physical therapist taught me some exercises to do in my wheelchair, and I worked myself up to 32 of each. The last one I learned was the wheelchair pushup. I did 32 of them today, for which I am very proud of myself. Stephen thought that you should know. ..
I was right about August being my month. August 20th is my surgery date, with July 13th being my pre-op appointment with the anesthesiologist. So I am praying for quick and safe healing.
We need paid readings and donations. Send donations to my Paypal account tezra.reitan@gmail.com and to Stephen’s email account at any of his email addies. If I get $5 donations, I shall send the donor a copy of one of my ebooks. For $20, you can have all five ebooks.
Remember, if someone from a Ning network asks you to pay, say “No way!” The only way this’ll work is if we all stick together and call the a**holes on their BS. We have to be willing to walk away from our networks, because they are counting on people being scared to walk away from their networks. This guy Jason Rosenthal is a bully, and there’s only one way to deal with a bully, and that is, to stand up to him.
Stephen was pretty pissed off that he would need only $87 to get back his long distance and preserve his DSL. He managed to scrape the $87 together. You guys have not been doing your part. It’s not as though he’s begging for hand outs. He is willing to return value for value given. Just three readings would have got him out of this predicament. Three readings or classes would do it. And $32 flat for a reading or a class is really a bargain. Ordinarily he charges $32 an hour, so $32 flat is a very good deal.
Back before my accident, Stephen was able to scrape $50 together to pay our friend to put our website together, and she’s working on it now. I’m looking forward to seeing it. It should be very impressive. Fear not, we’ll keep you abreast of all developments on this front. Abbott’s Inn International School of Magick will then be on the internet map, so to speak, in a big way.
Inquiring minds want to know: How do we add music to our sites? Please let us know. The person who helps us do that earns a reading on webcam on the popular IM clients. The person who helps us establish ourselves on the Paganspace.net chat client earns a reading. We’re using readings as currency here because we have no other medium to use for an incentive. All the money we make goes for paying the bills of bare-bones living.
Be sure and check out Fantasy for Pagans. Our next group here on Facebook will be Dragon’s Lair Coven 4.. Watch for it! Join it!
Humor is very important to both of us in our magick, and in our daily lives. I literally wouldn’t be alive without it, and neither would Stephen. Of late, most of our humor has derived from our putties. Their antics send us into titters and guffaws, if not hourly, then at least daily. They’re individuals, except for Frikki and Frakki, who we still can’t tell apart. We just call them each Frikki-Frakki. Putties don’t come when they’re called anyway, except when you have food for them. “They come for me, I just say Putties in a high pitched voice. Putties will get you though times of no money better than money will get you through times of no putties.” I can testify to that. I had to go through several years of no putties before I moved here. Our putties have forces of Will. Pyewacket moved in here saying “I live here. This is MY house. These are MY humans.” Pyewacket is an ancient Witch’s familiar name which means “lively spirit.” It was featured in “Bell, Book and Candle.” You can Google it. You might be able to see it on the Internet. But it ranks as one of the better movies there are about Witches and witchcraft, besides “Practical Magic? And “I Married a Witch,” which was, by the way the basis for the popular sitcom “Bewitched”.
By the way, this may be off-topic, but do you know where the term “yarn” as a synonym for story or tale came from? In the olden days, before all our modern electronics, there were storytellers. In some cases, they were full-fledged bards. In other cases, they were just shanachies or storytellers. The women of the household would be spinning, either with a drop spindle or one of those new fangled spinning wheels they came up with a couple hundred years ago. A really good spinner could spin an entire bobbin of yarn whilst the shanachie told one story, hence the term yarn for an often tall tale.
Stephen says it’s funny how many ways SSI claims they’re helping us, when in reality they’re just screwing us over. I explained to him the real meaning of service as in what a bull does to a cow. This may clarify for you what the word “service” means in “Internal Revenue Service.”
If you’ve been following our groups for any length of time at all, you doubtless know about vaudeville occultism. If I’m wrong, and you just joined us, here is whT IT IS. Vaudeville occultism is where a person or persons suddenly burst into song at random moments. This is usually because a given moment or occasion reminds us of a song. These attempts at singing are often off-key, either accidentally or deliberately, just to be funny. If I weren’t encumbered with this damned non-weightbearing cast and a healing broken ankle, I would
For 7 months, from November until June, I was missing one of the two handsets of my main telephone (landline). One day in early June, whilst at my computer I happened to catch a glint of silver in the space between my mattress and the lip of the bed. I picked it up, and lo and behold, it was my missing handset! I went to the doorway of Stephen’s room, and said,
“Frog, this is just gonna kill you. Guess what I just found. It’s charging now.”
“What?”
“You know that handset for my phone that Tina spirited away last November?”
“You found it?”
“Yes!”
The latest thing that Tina has spirited away is the charger for my cell phone and now the cell phone itself. There’s a charger here, but it won’t fit into my cell phone, and my rollover minutes are adding up. I have over 7000 minutes added up, and I’d like to use some of them, if it’s all right with Tina. What has occurred to you that could be considered humorous? Keep in mind that both Stephen and I have rather dark senses of humor, what is commonly known as gallows humor. Some say our senses of humor are twisted, but you walk a few miles in our shoes (yeah, all three of them) and see how straight your sense of humor is.
There is a putty curse of return on this place. It didn’t end with Pyewacket coming in and saying “This is MY house. I live here. These are MY humans.” A little creature about 8 or 9 months old has also made that announcement, with the added question, “Where’s my dinner?” We call him the Grey Bandit. He belongs to the guy next door, but he thinks he belongs here at Puttyhaven. Go figure. He gets along with all the other putties, even Inky likes him, and Inky, my boyfriend, likes very few other putties. What other putties will find their way to our door or window? But Pyewacket attacks him. She’s the one he’s the most like, so I guess she sees him as a rival and a threat. From time to time there is what we call a putty invasion, where a whole bunch of putties come in all at once and disrupt things. The putty mantra is “Where’s my food?”
I store my remotes and a number of CDs in a vitamin box. Bailee constantly tries to lie in the box even though the box is too small for her. Stephen is reciting all this to me whilst sitting in my wheel chair. The female cats are playing with their balls. We thought for over 9 months that Dr. Livingston was male, but I discovered about 3 months ago that she was female. Then when Oreo had her 2nd litter and refused to nurse them after 3 weeks Dr. Livingston stepped up and nursed them. But what did she have to nurse them with? Your guess is as good as mine. We know she wasn’t pregnant, because we had her fixed.
Dr. Livingston is part eagle; she has an eyrie on top of one of my book cases, and will dive bomb you if you’re not careful. The putties knocked the balls out of the round green thing, so Stephen had to put another ball in there. They’re going apes*** over the pink ball, and fighting over it. Bailee Beasley Beastly the Triple B Threat can mimic a beached whale. She’s 25 lbs of comedy and terror emphasis on the comedy part. Frikki-Frakki are a couple of funny putties that we cannot tell apart. At least one of them is a master farter.
We make them bark by talking to them in a high pitched voice, and I usually give them something for barking but Stephen is sadistic, so he doesn’t. The rule is that if there is a putty on your body, you can’t move or go anywhere. Sometimes he will be reading a book in bed, puttied and some important thing will come up on the computer and he’ll take the putty with him when he goes to the computer, because he’s scared of their retribution should he break the rule about moving when puttied. Stephen is an advocate for putty rights. He thinks they should have the right to vote. (You knew he was crazy didn’t you?)
Then there’s the Necroputtycon: their book, “The Way of the Paw”, sacred to the Goddess Bast. Pyewacket is a tough putty, she can lick anyone in the house. Stephen would like to investigate if they lost the other ball because they’re being quiet now, but he can’t because he’s puttied. One of the descriptive mantras about them is “Little pieces of putty crap.” We also sing “How much is that putty in the window?” Charles Hixon introduced me to “Pye, pye, Pyewacket, pye pye Pyewacket chocolate covered Pyewacket! Yum yum yum!”
My boyfriend Inky is “First Putty, who lived in pits, and learned to use his claws in self-defense.” This is a take off on a Firesign Theatre routine. If you ever want a putty to pay strict attention to you, eat in front of hir, especially meat. Man I had two putties paying attention to me. Then when I was through, I put the plate aside so they could lick it. Were they happy then!. One thing about putties; you can make up any stories you want about them and they don’t mind. As long as you feed and water them, provide a clean litter box, and scritch them frequently, you can make up any stories you want.
I have a friend in Houston, TX who has two dogs who are scared silly of thunderstorms. Whenever there is one, and there are lots in Texas, they cry to come in, and lean up against Di and shiver. Rex will bring Di’s room mate her socks if he thinks he can get a treat for them, and the other one will try to rub his backside up against anything he can in the house, but principally Di’s leg. So any pet can be funny. Send us your pet stories, especially the funny ones.
Stephen needs help in finding things that are funny, because life right now does not readily lend itself to humor. He got a real kick out of realizing that Judy Tenuda is still alive, kicking, and still looks hot. She also still calls herself “The Goddess.” We are both big fans of hers, since she is the closest thing we have to a Pagan comic on the airwaves. He wants to see her do an HBO or Showtime special so it won’t be censored. I have a friend who reminds me a lot of her, except that Judy is dark haired and my friend is blonde.
. The Firesign Theatre is alive, well, and on the internet. I looked up the Firesign Theatre this morning. Their website is http://www.firesigntheatre.com/ . Their show can be heard through webstreaming on www.wfmu.org.
A month ago, I broke my right ankle. It was in a gallstone attack. I went to the bathroom, and was going to go to my room again when I was hit by a wave of pain so severe that I passed out. I must’ve sat on my ankle hard because when I tried to get up, my ankle went crunch! I sank down on my rear again against the door. Stephen and I had a dialogue:.”Are you all right?” he asked.
“No, I’m in a lot of pain.”
“I’m calling 911.”
“Ok.”
He asked me the questions the dispatcher asked him. I answered them. At length they arrived. I took my book and my purse with me. We went to Kaiser Morse hospital. I gave them the address. They knew how to get there. We arrived after a few minutes. They admitted me, and the next morning, my ankle was operated on. Then I spent from then until Wednesday the 7th in the hospital. I came home, and am now in full recovery. Three weeks ago I got into my room, and finally got access to my computer. Will give you updates as we proceed. Update: two weeks ago I got out of the house. My physical therapist taught me how to hop down the steps using my aluminum walker. I used it to go to the liturgy meeting, and then Sunday I went to our Grove’s Lughnasadh ritual, where I donated a dollar, and offered some whiskey to Miach for my own healing, the healing of my friend Snoodlady, who was in the hospital with a serious sinus infection that gave her double vision and vertigo, and my friend Cherye who has a nasty staph infection in her legs and feet. On two fronts there were immediate results. Snoodlady felt well enough to come home on Monday, and I learned to carry my walker whilst in my wheelchair. My physical therapist taught me some exercises to do in my wheelchair, and I worked myself up to 32 of each. The last one I learned was the wheelchair pushup. I did 32 of them today, for which I am very proud of myself. Stephen thought that you should know. ..
I was right about August being my month. August 20th is my surgery date, with July 13th being my pre-op appointment with the anesthesiologist. So I am praying for quick and safe healing.
We need paid readings and donations. Send donations to my Paypal account tezra.reitan@gmail.com and to Stephen’s email account at any of his email addies. If I get $5 donations, I shall send the donor a copy of one of my ebooks. For $20, you can have all five ebooks.
Remember, if someone from a Ning network asks you to pay, say “No way!” The only way this’ll work is if we all stick together and call the a**holes on their BS. We have to be willing to walk away from our networks, because they are counting on people being scared to walk away from their networks. This guy Jason Rosenthal is a bully, and there’s only one way to deal with a bully, and that is, to stand up to him.
Stephen was pretty pissed off that he would need only $87 to get back his long distance and preserve his DSL. He managed to scrape the $87 together. You guys have not been doing your part. It’s not as though he’s begging for hand outs. He is willing to return value for value given. Just three readings would have got him out of this predicament. Three readings or classes would do it. And $32 flat for a reading or a class is really a bargain. Ordinarily he charges $32 an hour, so $32 flat is a very good deal.
Back before my accident, Stephen was able to scrape $50 together to pay our friend to put our website together, and she’s working on it now. I’m looking forward to seeing it. It should be very impressive. Fear not, we’ll keep you abreast of all developments on this front. Abbott’s Inn International School of Magick will then be on the internet map, so to speak, in a big way.
Inquiring minds want to know: How do we add music to our sites? Please let us know. The person who helps us do that earns a reading on webcam on the popular IM clients. The person who helps us establish ourselves on the Paganspace.net chat client earns a reading. We’re using readings as currency here because we have no other medium to use for an incentive. All the money we make goes for paying the bills of bare-bones living.
Be sure and check out Fantasy for Pagans. Our next group here on Facebook will be Dragon’s Lair Coven 4.. Watch for it! Join it!
Saturday, October 31, 2009
Spawn:Such a Lovely Word
Welcome to Pagan Spawn. We’re very glad you could make. Spawn. What a lovely word. It means offspring. When I saw Stephen for the first time in over two years back in ’97,, practically the first thing I said to him was “You’ve spawned!” That was our code phrase for “You have offspring!” A lot of the things we say to each other may make no sense to anyone else, or may be shocking, but we get what it means. Our spawns (we each have a daughter) are both brilliant. They’re both mutants (in the best way possible). They’re both smarter than their parents. I had some idea what to do with and how to handle my spawn. I don’t think Stephen and Debbie had any idea what to do with theirs.
James’ parents let him watch things like Conan the Barbarian by Robert E. Howard. One night he was staying up late watching the Necronomicon and a movie about Simon Magus. Instantly he was hooked on the whole Lovecraftian mythos about the Old Ones, Cthulhu. Now he is convinced, and has convinced Stephen that Alhazred really lived, and that the Necronomicon is real. I say that many of the rituals may be real, in that they were ancient Sumerian, but Simon Magus could easily have copied them from somewhere. Maybe he knows Sumerian cuneiform; who am I to know? Both Abramelin and Alhazred were sages. Stephen gets the same vibe about both of them. I think both of them are mythical. That’s okay because we’re individuals, and individuals often disagree.
I first got involved with H.P. Lovecraft when I returned from L.A. in 1978, and was reading Stephen King and H.P. Lovecraft so that I could sleep at night. My 10 months in L.A. we so horrific and traumatic that I found King and Lovecraft to actually be comforting reading. Later, much later, when I was with Doc, we watched movies on the SciFi channel (now the SyFy channel) about Dagon, and other Lovecraftian classics. I had also acquired both the Simon Magus and the Donald Tyson Necronomicons. I also have copies of the Dark Grimoire and the Secrets of the Necronomicon Tarot decks. We have the NecronomiconNetwork.ning.com network. “All Cthulhu All the Time”, the sister network to this one. We want to play “Call of Cthulhu” on PaganSpace.net’s chat facility.
Don’t forget to stop by our 16 Yahoo groups and post to them. But please make sure that what you post is pertinent to the group. Somebody by the name of Kristin Harris is posting to all our Google groups asking if we can identify a song for her. People: none of our groups is about identifying a stupid song for anyone. If you want to do that look and see if there are any song identifying groups in either Yahoo or Google groups. We lost nine of our Yahoo groups because nobody posted to them for more than 6 weeks. People these groups are your groups not just ours. We need to show Yahoo that these groups are going concerns.
Stephen really wore out the putties this afternoon. We have this putty toy that is a plastic ring with a ball in it that a putty or a human can spin around. The puttiettes were chasing the ball and batting at it as Stephen pushed it around, and then Dr. Livingston I. Presume started batting the ball around himself. Frikki and Frakki the pseudo-Siamese kittens also batted the ball around. They got so worn out that Frikki is now crashed out on Stephen’s leg. They have three other toys they like to play with. One is the Dreadful Headset: that is, one of two telephone headsets that developed shorts, so they are useless to Stephen as headsets. There is also the Deadly Fatal Watch Chain that the putties love to play with because it moves and is shiny. Then there are the Baneful Beads. The puttiettes run all around trying to get hold of one of these three. It is hilarious and we laugh our heads off at them. These are goofy cats. But their toys are also our weapons against them in the Putty Conspiracy. We have a bit of a controversy on how putty and putties should be spelled. You see how it should be spelled, but Stephen spells it puddy and puddies. I spell it the way I do because of “Silly Putty” and Tweety Bird’s “I tot I taw a putty tat! I deed! I deed!” I found the word “Putty” on a leaflet from the place where I get most of my clothes. Of course, it described a color, a kind of light taupe, light khaki shade, not a cat, but still putty is putty. Today while I was gone, Dr. Livingston stole Stephen’s watch you know, the Deadly, Fatal Watch Chain, and took it under the table where the plastic bags containing his drinks are. Dr. Livingston I. Presume tangled up the chain into the handles of the plastic bags. It took Stephen several minutes of patient untangling before he could wrest his watch free. He didn’t have to do this just once but twice. Stephen’s got Dr. Livingston I. Presume chewing on his own tail. He calls it “putty-ouroboros”.
Ted Andrews, a well-known Pagan author of many books about animals and magick, lost his years’ long battle with cancer on Saturday, and passed through the veil into the Summerland. He kept the fact that he had cancer from everybody until the very last. If you know more about the death of Ted Andrews, please post here. As soon as we find out anything, we’ll post here. If you know more about Isaac Bonewits’ condition, please post here.
I’m on KEEN now, so call me. I changed the spelling of my name slightly so that the non-Welsh speakers could pronounce it. It’s spelled Teiweth ShadowDancer. My number is 8342. My extension number is 03877627. Ask for me. I’m sure it means something qabalistically, but I haven’t looked it up yet in Godwin’s. The site is www.keen.com, so go there and look me up. Stephen’s British friend Peter is threatening to call me, but he hasn’t called me yet. He has only 5 hours and 21 minutes yet tonight, before he’ll have to wait until tomorrow morning. I refuse to be a slave to the telephone as Stephen is, so I’m offline from 10 p.m. until 8 a.m. I need my beauty sleep. I don’t know whether it does me any good cosmetically, but it does my moods a world ahead, as well as my physical body.
I’m on KEEN now, so call me. I changed the spelling of my name slightly so that the non-Welsh speakers could pronounce it. It’s spelled Teiweth ShadowDancer. My number is 8342. I’m sure it means something qabalistically, but I haven’t looked it up yet in Godwin’s. The site is www.keen.com, so go there and look me up. Stephen’s British friend Peter is threatening to call me, but he hasn’t called me yet. He has only 5 hours and 21 minutes yet tonight, before he’ll have to wait until tomorrow morning. I refuse to be a slave to the telephone as Stephen is, so I’m offline from 10 p.m. until 8 a.m. I need my beauty sleep. I don’t know whether it does me any good cosmetically, but it does my moods a world ahead, as well as my physical body.
Stephen’s in big trouble this month, folks. He got defrauded again has a new card coming. He owes almost $600 on his phone bill, and is still a month behind on his rent. You can help, folks. Please please PLEASE call for readings and/or classes. For $32, you can either have a reading using your choice of deck/tool; .or a class on your choice of topic in the vast area of magick. With webcam and voice on Yahoo IM, Windows Live Msgr, or, and Stephen’s in big trouble this month, folks. He got defrauded again has a Skype, it’s almost like being there with him. You can also only have it done on the phone. For $60, you can have both a reading and a class, Not two readings though, unless they are using different methods and it’s on two different topics. Call him on 916-455-2267 (land-line) or 916-612-2504 (cell) or contact him online at abbotts_inn on Yahoo IM, abbotts_inn@hotmail.com on Windows Live Msgr, or email him at abbottsinn_school@yahoo.com. Donations of any size can be paid to his Paypal account at abbottsinn@gmail.com, or mailed to Stephen Abbott at 4909 Roosevelt Ave. Sacramento, CA 95820. These donations go to Abbott’s Inn International School of Magick, to keep it afloat. If the donation is less than $32, however, you will not get a reading or a class. Also, spread his Zodiac referral number 1-800-280-8496. You get directly to him and he gets a full dollar per minute, instead of the 32 cents per minute he gets without the referral number, and it doesn’t cost you extra., just the regular per minute charge. Also, we need staff, and those who work as hard as we do will get a year and a day’s worth of free readings and/or classes. You can be anywhere because we’re international.
In just a day I will be starting on NaNoWriMo, which is actually a misnomer, since it has gone global. NaNoWriMo stands for National Novel Writing Month, but should be GloNoWriMo, for Global Novel Writing Month. I will finish the novel I started back this past spring. I’m writing it as an historical fantasy. It’s about La Voisin, a real 17th century witch who lived in France during the reign of the Sun King. Will me luck, folks
James’ parents let him watch things like Conan the Barbarian by Robert E. Howard. One night he was staying up late watching the Necronomicon and a movie about Simon Magus. Instantly he was hooked on the whole Lovecraftian mythos about the Old Ones, Cthulhu. Now he is convinced, and has convinced Stephen that Alhazred really lived, and that the Necronomicon is real. I say that many of the rituals may be real, in that they were ancient Sumerian, but Simon Magus could easily have copied them from somewhere. Maybe he knows Sumerian cuneiform; who am I to know? Both Abramelin and Alhazred were sages. Stephen gets the same vibe about both of them. I think both of them are mythical. That’s okay because we’re individuals, and individuals often disagree.
I first got involved with H.P. Lovecraft when I returned from L.A. in 1978, and was reading Stephen King and H.P. Lovecraft so that I could sleep at night. My 10 months in L.A. we so horrific and traumatic that I found King and Lovecraft to actually be comforting reading. Later, much later, when I was with Doc, we watched movies on the SciFi channel (now the SyFy channel) about Dagon, and other Lovecraftian classics. I had also acquired both the Simon Magus and the Donald Tyson Necronomicons. I also have copies of the Dark Grimoire and the Secrets of the Necronomicon Tarot decks. We have the NecronomiconNetwork.ning.com network. “All Cthulhu All the Time”, the sister network to this one. We want to play “Call of Cthulhu” on PaganSpace.net’s chat facility.
Don’t forget to stop by our 16 Yahoo groups and post to them. But please make sure that what you post is pertinent to the group. Somebody by the name of Kristin Harris is posting to all our Google groups asking if we can identify a song for her. People: none of our groups is about identifying a stupid song for anyone. If you want to do that look and see if there are any song identifying groups in either Yahoo or Google groups. We lost nine of our Yahoo groups because nobody posted to them for more than 6 weeks. People these groups are your groups not just ours. We need to show Yahoo that these groups are going concerns.
Stephen really wore out the putties this afternoon. We have this putty toy that is a plastic ring with a ball in it that a putty or a human can spin around. The puttiettes were chasing the ball and batting at it as Stephen pushed it around, and then Dr. Livingston I. Presume started batting the ball around himself. Frikki and Frakki the pseudo-Siamese kittens also batted the ball around. They got so worn out that Frikki is now crashed out on Stephen’s leg. They have three other toys they like to play with. One is the Dreadful Headset: that is, one of two telephone headsets that developed shorts, so they are useless to Stephen as headsets. There is also the Deadly Fatal Watch Chain that the putties love to play with because it moves and is shiny. Then there are the Baneful Beads. The puttiettes run all around trying to get hold of one of these three. It is hilarious and we laugh our heads off at them. These are goofy cats. But their toys are also our weapons against them in the Putty Conspiracy. We have a bit of a controversy on how putty and putties should be spelled. You see how it should be spelled, but Stephen spells it puddy and puddies. I spell it the way I do because of “Silly Putty” and Tweety Bird’s “I tot I taw a putty tat! I deed! I deed!” I found the word “Putty” on a leaflet from the place where I get most of my clothes. Of course, it described a color, a kind of light taupe, light khaki shade, not a cat, but still putty is putty. Today while I was gone, Dr. Livingston stole Stephen’s watch you know, the Deadly, Fatal Watch Chain, and took it under the table where the plastic bags containing his drinks are. Dr. Livingston I. Presume tangled up the chain into the handles of the plastic bags. It took Stephen several minutes of patient untangling before he could wrest his watch free. He didn’t have to do this just once but twice. Stephen’s got Dr. Livingston I. Presume chewing on his own tail. He calls it “putty-ouroboros”.
Ted Andrews, a well-known Pagan author of many books about animals and magick, lost his years’ long battle with cancer on Saturday, and passed through the veil into the Summerland. He kept the fact that he had cancer from everybody until the very last. If you know more about the death of Ted Andrews, please post here. As soon as we find out anything, we’ll post here. If you know more about Isaac Bonewits’ condition, please post here.
I’m on KEEN now, so call me. I changed the spelling of my name slightly so that the non-Welsh speakers could pronounce it. It’s spelled Teiweth ShadowDancer. My number is 8342. My extension number is 03877627. Ask for me. I’m sure it means something qabalistically, but I haven’t looked it up yet in Godwin’s. The site is www.keen.com, so go there and look me up. Stephen’s British friend Peter is threatening to call me, but he hasn’t called me yet. He has only 5 hours and 21 minutes yet tonight, before he’ll have to wait until tomorrow morning. I refuse to be a slave to the telephone as Stephen is, so I’m offline from 10 p.m. until 8 a.m. I need my beauty sleep. I don’t know whether it does me any good cosmetically, but it does my moods a world ahead, as well as my physical body.
I’m on KEEN now, so call me. I changed the spelling of my name slightly so that the non-Welsh speakers could pronounce it. It’s spelled Teiweth ShadowDancer. My number is 8342. I’m sure it means something qabalistically, but I haven’t looked it up yet in Godwin’s. The site is www.keen.com, so go there and look me up. Stephen’s British friend Peter is threatening to call me, but he hasn’t called me yet. He has only 5 hours and 21 minutes yet tonight, before he’ll have to wait until tomorrow morning. I refuse to be a slave to the telephone as Stephen is, so I’m offline from 10 p.m. until 8 a.m. I need my beauty sleep. I don’t know whether it does me any good cosmetically, but it does my moods a world ahead, as well as my physical body.
Stephen’s in big trouble this month, folks. He got defrauded again has a new card coming. He owes almost $600 on his phone bill, and is still a month behind on his rent. You can help, folks. Please please PLEASE call for readings and/or classes. For $32, you can either have a reading using your choice of deck/tool; .or a class on your choice of topic in the vast area of magick. With webcam and voice on Yahoo IM, Windows Live Msgr, or, and Stephen’s in big trouble this month, folks. He got defrauded again has a Skype, it’s almost like being there with him. You can also only have it done on the phone. For $60, you can have both a reading and a class, Not two readings though, unless they are using different methods and it’s on two different topics. Call him on 916-455-2267 (land-line) or 916-612-2504 (cell) or contact him online at abbotts_inn on Yahoo IM, abbotts_inn@hotmail.com on Windows Live Msgr, or email him at abbottsinn_school@yahoo.com. Donations of any size can be paid to his Paypal account at abbottsinn@gmail.com, or mailed to Stephen Abbott at 4909 Roosevelt Ave. Sacramento, CA 95820. These donations go to Abbott’s Inn International School of Magick, to keep it afloat. If the donation is less than $32, however, you will not get a reading or a class. Also, spread his Zodiac referral number 1-800-280-8496. You get directly to him and he gets a full dollar per minute, instead of the 32 cents per minute he gets without the referral number, and it doesn’t cost you extra., just the regular per minute charge. Also, we need staff, and those who work as hard as we do will get a year and a day’s worth of free readings and/or classes. You can be anywhere because we’re international.
In just a day I will be starting on NaNoWriMo, which is actually a misnomer, since it has gone global. NaNoWriMo stands for National Novel Writing Month, but should be GloNoWriMo, for Global Novel Writing Month. I will finish the novel I started back this past spring. I’m writing it as an historical fantasy. It’s about La Voisin, a real 17th century witch who lived in France during the reign of the Sun King. Will me luck, folks
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